Are you from the Ghetto?

3. Brand name stores don't want to came to your neighborhood

4. You consider rats and roaches as pets (even if you don't, they still live with you.)

5. The roaches in your house only come out when company comes.

6. The back of your toilet seat is always off and it has to be manually flushed.

7. You have more than 10 uses for Vaseline

8. All your funiture is covered in plastic.

9. You keep a filthy house.

10. You wear a shower cap on everywhere but the shower.

11. The only art you own at home is on your fingernails.

12. You perm your 3-year-old's hair.

13. If you weigh more than 300lbs. and claim you can't eat anyone else's cooking.

14. If you have ever dropped food on the floor and kissed it up to God before you ate it.

15. You're know for rolling the following - your eyes, your R's, your wrists and your neck.

16. You add an "ED" or "T" to every word that is already past tense (TOOKED, LIGHT-SKINNEDED, KILT, RUINT)

17. The best pair of shoes you own are sneakers.

18. You own more sneakers than you own books.

19. If you wear color contacts you're ghetto, period.

20. You think fatback is a source of nutrition. (NOTE: there is NO such thing is low-fat fatback)

21.You eat these ghetto snacks - Pork rinds, chitterlings, moonpies, sunflower seeds, juice filled wax, Bom Pops, Pop Tarts, Lemon Heads, Red hots, Chick-o-stick, candy wax lips, Boston Baked Beans, candy necklesses,Pixie Sticks and Mr.Softee.

22. You're certainly ghetto if you eat chitterlings (a.k.a. "shitterlings"), period.

23.You drink these ghetto beverages - Yoo-hoo, malt liquor,sugar water, Koolaide, Red Dog, Fanta brand soda, .99 cent a gallon anything and Tab soda.

24. You chew your baby's food than feed it to them. ( You ain't no bird, so stop acting like one!)

25. You beat your kid with an extension cord.

26. If you sound like a rap artist when beating your children.

27. Your children don't know the words to "Miss Mary Mack" but know all the lyrics to Snoop Dog's records.

28. Your children go to school smelling like hot bacon grease.

29. You pay more for your kids sneakers than their daycare.

30. You pinch your new born's nose to make it thin.

31. If the first word out of your baby's mouth is "Yo"

32. If your son thinks his real name is "Little Man"

33. You are definitly low-class if you don't know who's the father of your baby.

34. You use abortion is a form of birth control.

35. You wear purfume on dirty clothes to think you're clean.

36. You recline your car seat so far back you can hardly see, just so you can get your proper 'lean' on.

37. No matter how ugly and old your car is, the first thing you get is some rims and a alarm system.

38. No matter how ugly and old you car is, the second thing you get is a sound system.

40. Your rims cost more than your car is worth.

41. You have a 3 bedroom house and 15 people live in it.

42. You can describe people by their gold teeth.

43. You have a gold tooth.

44. You constantly use *69 on your telephone and say, "Did you just call here?"

45. You ask if Dollar General accepts checks.

46. You can't afford milk, so you pour water on your cereal.

47. Your milk label says "add water"

48. You turn 13 and just found out that milk does'nt come from a white powder.

49. You turn down a marriage proposal, but keep the engagement ring.

50. You keep food stamps in a money clip.

51. Your Kids ask your for food stamps to buy candy with.

52. You can trace relatives as far back as 5th and 6th cousins.

53. You don't shave and the hair on your legs is nappy.

54. You put clear nail polish on fake jewelry so it can last longer.

55. You know you are definitly ghetto when you own jewelry that weighs more than a 400 page book!

56. You have more gold in your mouth than Fort Knox.

57. The dentist-installed gold overlay in your mouth spells words.

58. You find yourself in a physical confrontation because someone stepped on your sneakers.

59. Your strech your jeans hard enough that they can stand up like card board on their own

60. You're hooked on ebonics

61. The only skirt you own is really a pair of denim shorts with a flap across the front.

62. Your bank is a check-cashing and bail & bond place.

63. You have stuff put on layaway at a 99 cent store.

64. You hang out with kids named "Scar Daddy", "Slop" or "Shankey"

65. If you're ever called your friends "Homey", "holmes","dawg", "ma brotha", "money", "slim-slice", "shorty", "G", "girl", "boy", "brotha man", or "sista girl".

66. You live in the housing projects because you can't affort a real house.

67. You have project heat (Note: that means you have to open your window in the winter.

68. You neighborhood has it's own drunk.

69. The police know your address by heart.

70. If you have ever been a guest on Jerry Springer, Cops, Maury or any other tastless daytime talk show.

71. Not only are you fast, but ghetto when your under 18 with a baby.

72. Your grandmother is 42, you mother is 28, and your 14 with one on the way. (You do the math)

73. You use your welfare check as collateral.

74. You don't have a job, but somehow are able to get your hair and nails done on a weekly basis.

75. You do NOT have your own place, DON'T own your own car and simply don't have anything of your own, but you and you're 2-year-old wear leather coats.

76. You named your daughters after cars you can't afford.

77. You throw a "pool party" using a fire hidrent.

78. You're dumb enough to light a firecracker in your pocket.

79. You're ever stole a 40 oz. beer from the liquor store.

80. If certainly ghetto if you sneak a 40 oz. into church.

81. You shout in church just to see how long the ushers take to get you.

82. You bring a switch to church in your "big purse" because you kids are so bad.

83. There is a hologram of Jesus on your wall. Look at it one way, his eyes are open. Look at it another, and his eyes are closed.

84. The offering plate goes around 5 times at your church.

85. You jerk and pop to full gospel music.

86. You learn all the lastest dance moves from your church choir.

87. You think a Bible published in ebonics would be a good idea.

88. Your mom has a velvet painting hanging in the living room with a nude black woman and a zodiac sign on it.

89. You carry a bottle of hot sauce in your purse.

90. You have a hot plate in your closet.

91. You eat a sandwich that does not contain any meat (ex. a mayonnaise sandwich)

92. When Koolaide is the only drink in the house.

93. You try to use old soap residue to make a new bar of soap.

94. You take bubble baths with dish washing liquid.

95. Your mom turns the stove on to heat the house.

96. All the lampshades in your house are plastic.

97.You use plain rubbing alcohol as deoderant.

98. You still think the song "I Believe I Can Fly" is 'da bomb'.

99. You've been married twice and still have the same inlaws.

100. You definitly ghetto when your childern are also your nieces and nephews.

101. Your mother still thinks that Teena Marie is 'da bomb'.

102. Your father still owns a 'Parliament Funkadelic' album.

103.You have 3 or more hairstyles on your head. (French rolls on the back right, Crimps on the back left, Spiral curls going off to one side, and fingerwaves in the front.

104. Your mother does your hair in the kitchen.

105. Your flourescent cell phone matches the hair weave in your ponytail.

106. If you have more fake hair than real hair.

107. You wear neon colors in your hair.

108. Your man can wear his hair in a ponytail but you can't.

109.You're certainly ghetto when all you wear is sports jerseys, basket ball sneakers - and you can't play an inch of real sports.

110. Your skin tone is a deep chocolate and you dye your hair a honey blonde.

111. You refer to the nape of your neck as the "kitchen"

112. You cain't (kant) spell can't.

113. You still swear everything still says "Whoop there it is!"

114. If you're certainly low-class if you think you're attitude problem is a
gift from God.

115. You've actually invited someone to talk to your hand.

116. You don't care what people say about your father, but lose your mind when someone talks bad about your mother.

117. You think you are in the suburbs whenever you see grass.

118. You get spooked while camping in the woods because there are no street lights.

119.There is a resturant in your neighborhood that serves chitterlings, mustard greens, ham hocks, neck bone with rice and gravy.

120. You eat eggs and rice for breakfeast and dinner.

121. You eat chips soda for breakfeat.

122. You think going on a diet means no candy.

123. You have more dishes in your bedroon than in your kitchen.

124. You have faux wood wallpaper in your house.

125. You have a homemade license plate on the back of your car.

126.When you were young, you thought you were and olympic gymnast because you could do a high flip on a pissy old mattress that someone threw out.

127. You play basketball on a milk crete...or a cardboard box.

128. Your basketball hoop rim has no net.

129. You break-dance on concrete.

130. You painted the stripes on your shell-up Adidas.

131. You own a pair of Cazals.

132. You used to wear parachute pants.