1. If you introduce your wife as "[email protected]"

2. If your spouse sends you an e-mail instead of calling you todinner

3. If you can quote scenes from any Monty Python movie

4. If you want an 64X CDROM for Christmas

5. If Dilbert is your hero

6. If you stare at an orange juice container because it saysCONCENTRATE

7. If you can name 6 Star Trek episodes

8. If the only jokes you receive are through e-mail

9. If your wrist watch has more computing power than a 486DX-50

10. If your idea of good interpersonal communication means gettingthe decimal point in the right place

11. If you look forward to Christmas only to put together the kids'toys

12. If you use a CAD package to design your son's Pine Wood Derby car

13. If you have used coat hangers and duct tape for something otherthan hanging coats and taping ducts

14. If, at Christmas, it goes without saying that you will be the oneto find the burnt-out bulb in the string

15. If you window shop at Radio Shack

16. If your ideal evening consists of fast-forwarding through thelatest sci-fi movie looking for technical inaccuracies

17. If you have "Dilbert" comics displayed anywhere in yourwork area

18. If you carry on a one-hour debate over the expected results of atest that actually takes five minutes to run

19. If you are convinced you can build a phazer out of your garagedoor opener and your camera's flash attachment

20. If you don't even know where the cover to your personal computeris

21. If you have modified your can-opener to be microprocessor driven

If you know the direction the water swirls when you flush

22. If you own "Official Star Trek" anything

23. If you have ever taken the back off your TV just to see what'sinside

24. If a team of you and your co-workers have set out to modify theantenna on the radio in your work area for better reception

25. If you ever burned down the gymnasium with your Science Fairproject

26. If you are currently gathering the components to build your ownnuclear reactor

27. If you own one or more white short-sleeve dress shirts

28. If you have never backed-up your hard drive

29. If you are aware that computers are actually only good forplaying games, but are afraid to say it out loud.

30. If you truly believe aliens are living among us

31. If you have ever saved the power cord from a broken appliance

32. If you have ever purchased an electronic appliance "as-is"

33. If you see a good design and still have to change it

34. If the salespeople at Circuit City can't answer any of yourquestions

35. If you still own a slide rule and you know how to work it

36. If the thought that a CD could refer to finance or music neverenters your mind

37. If you own a set of itty-bitty screw drivers, but you don'tremember where they are

38. If you rotate your screen savers more frequently than yourautomobile tires

39. If you have a functioning home copier machine, but every toasteryou own turns bread into charcoal

40. If you have more toys than your kids

41. If you need a checklist to turn on the TV

42. If you have introduced your kids by the wrong name

43. If you have a habit of destroying things in order to see how theywork

44. If your I.Q. number is bigger than your weight

45. If the microphone or visual aids at a meeting don't work and yourush up to the front to fix it

46. If you can remember 7 computer passwords but not your anniversary

47. If you have memorized the program schedule for the Discoverychannel and have seen most of the shows already

48. If you have ever owned a calculator with no equal key and knowwhat RPN stands for

49. If your father sat 2 inches in front of your family's first colorTV with a magnifying lens to see how they made the colors, andyou grew up thinking that was normal

50. If you know how to take the cover off of your computer, and whatsize screw driver to use

51. If you can type 70 words a minute but can't read your ownhandwriting

52. If people groan at the party when you pick out the music

53. If you can't remember where you parked your car for the 3rd timethis week

54. If you did the sound system for your senior prom

55. If your checkbook always balances

56. If your wristwatch has more buttons than a telephone

57. If you have more friends on the Internet than in real life

58. If you thought the real heroes of "Apollo 13" were themission controllers

59. If you spend more on your home computer than your car

60. If you know what http:/ stands for

61. If you've ever tried to repair a $5.00 radio

62. If your three year old son asks why the sky is blue and you tryto explain atmospheric absorption theory